Normalize It Forward | Spencer Ganus | College Students

 

College students have to juggle a lot of responsibilities every single day, and these go even beyond schoolwork. Some have extracurricular duties, while others have side hustles to focus on. Such hectic schedules push them to set aside self-care, and their mental health suffers the most. Marc Lehman sits down with actress Spencer Ganus, who guides high schoolers through college admissions. Talking all about her wellness blog and her own college experience, she discusses how young adults should handle the pressures of social media and the adverse impact of the pandemic. Spencer also explores the importance of time management, self-care, and being open-minded to exploring different passions.

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Mental Health Advice For College Students With Spencer Ganus

Welcome Spencer Lacey Ganus, who is an actress and voice actress. Two of her roles that she’s known for are through Comedy Central’s South Park as Ike as well as Elsa in Frozen. We are particularly interested in talking to Spencer about Spencer’s wellness and lifestyle, social media blog that she runs. Spencer, welcome.

Thank you so much for having me. I’m happy to be here.

Spencer Wellness

Thanks for being here with us. We’d love to touch on a number of different things, but Spencer, and in many ways, love to hear a little bit more about Spencer Wellness, your blog. It sounds so fascinating.

It sounds great. I grew up in a very wellness-oriented family. I have been drinking protein smoothies since I was like three years old, and I was raised in more of a health-conscious, wellness-oriented household, which inspired me to want to live my own healthier life. That particularly came to fruition when I was in college and as I was graduating college and living on my own for the first time, on my terms, when I had the opportunity to either continue on the path that I was so lucky to be raised on or do the thing that a lot of people do in their twenties, which does not prioritize their wellness maybe prioritize other things in their life.

I was excited about the opportunity to take life into my own hands and continue going down a path that I thought was intentional. In doing that, I decided to share my journey. It started by posting recipes that were healthy or desserts or smoothies or fun things I was making in the kitchen, honestly over the pandemic when I had some extra time. It has since evolved into a much more balanced lifestyle. It’s now what I like to talk about, and the biggest value that I embody with wellness is finding realistic wellness and balance as a young person. I’m not giving up eating cake and like, I have a whole cake business, ironically enough, that I post about on my wellness Instagram page. That’s not healthy at all.

 

Normalize It Forward | Spencer Ganus | College Students

 

It’s like real butter, real sugar, all the things but it’s a creative outlet for me. I love being able to think for people and beyond decorating it, it embodies my value of having your cake and eating it too, and balance and living in a way that encompasses wellness and intentionality, but also not giving up the things that you love because I would be happy doing that for the rest of my life, and I don’t think promoting that is positive.

That’s where the idea for my blog came about. I have an Instagram page called @HealthyWithSpence, and then on my TikTok, I started posting more. It’s a little sillier. My Instagram is probably more intentional with my content, but it’s been super fun. I have had some incredible opportunities to work with brands that I align with, whether it’s clothing brands and workout clothes, food brands, or going to some fun events in Los Angeles where there’s so much happening in the world of social media. I have made so many friends and amazing, real, authentic connections through this blog with other girls and boys and everyone who shares the same values as me. It’s fun.

Intentionality

I have 1,000 questions for you. First of all, your cakes are amazing. You are very talented. They are beautiful. I love how you said that. The word “intentional” is such an important word. As a therapist, I run a virtual practice called U Are Heard, and and my therapists, I see students all over the country with mental health needs I get asked all the time What is the hang-up of getting assistance from a young person getting help when they need it?

I find myself saying that all the time to young people If you need assistance, get it. If you know all that stuff. The intentional piece is so important because young individuals often aren’t very intentional, and they go with the flow, even if the flow isn’t healthy and I don’t mean to judge when I say that. I mean that sometimes that path takes a person down a difficult trail. I have seen students, for example, not getting enough rest. I have seen students not get any physical activity. I have seen students missing classes regularly, and you know where that’s headed but being intentional is such a big part of specifically directing your journey and pushing it in a positive fashion.

I graduated from Duke University a few years ago, and especially at a school like Duke that had so many incredible opportunities, it was easy to not rest. It was easy to say yes to so many things when you have multiple interests, like someone the way that I do. There were times when I was going down that path, I wasn’t the kid missing class, but I was the kid missing sleep to go to class and to go to other things, and my mental health fluctuated, whether it was being anxious or stressed or overwhelmed, and not being in my best functioning, mentally healthy headspace because of things like lack of sleep or even my eating habits, too. Throughout college, fluctuated. It was in the post-grad years that I feel I have been able to cultivate a lot more mindfulness and intentionality, given that it’s always a journey. We are always growing, but I understand, and that was and still is me as a young twenty-something post-grad student, for sure.

Self-Care

It is a journey. Let me ask you about an interesting topic, self-care. When you think about the broad topic of self-care, about eating, sleeping, exercise, but it’s when I say the phrase self-care, what do you think of?

I think of all those things, and I think of it even more so encompassing what fulfills me. For me, self-care isn’t the physical eating, sleeping, drinking enough water, taking care of myself in that way, but it’s in the way that I have gotten to know myself, where for me, self-care at times is being alone, recharging, taking time by myself and recharging that social battery, but I’m extroverted and for me, more often than not, self-care looks like cultivating a group of friends who recharge and fill me and making time in my schedule to see my friends but it sounds so silly, but when you are busy and you might have been careers the way that I am, whether it’s with my relationship or with my friends.

Self-care is not just about addressing the needs of your body. It is also about being alone and recharging yourself. Share on X

I feel like blocking that time in my schedule. It’s something that is an act of self-care. Finding a balance between my entrepreneurial freelance artist life and having a normal life of seeing my friends on the weekend, most of them do have 9:00 to 5:00s. That’s been a huge piece of self-care that when I sacrifice too much social time or too much alone time, I think my mental health suffers from that.

For me, self-care is building a life of things that fulfill me, whether it’s time alone, or time with friends, and then personally, creativity is a huge value of mine as a creative person, whether it’s making cakes like you said, or writing, or I’m a dancer as well, and moving my body is something that fulfills me, too. For me, self-care is not about eating, sleeping, or drinking water, but it’s about booking a dance class and going for a walk.

Doing something physically. Moving my body is important to me. Often, that is coupled with something creative that gets my brain stimulated in a way that’s fulfilling beyond what I do for work. The last piece of self-care for me is grounding and being in nature. Getting sunshine is important for my mental health, and for having met gray in Los Angeles. I will go touch some grass anyway.

Connecting with nature, I’m so lucky to live close to the beach-ish, and for me, going to see the ocean and being in nature, seeing trees, getting fresh air is something as simple as going on my patio for even ten minutes in the middle of my workday. Self-care for me encompasses beyond the physical things you think of when you think of wellness and well-being, but also building that life of things that you know recharge you and fulfill you, whether it’s friends, alone time, being in nature, creativity, or moving your body.

You’ve learned a lot over your teen years and developed into a person who knows what she needs and like you said, life is a journey. It doesn’t matter. Are you continuing to learn all of that? From young adults, I want to highlight what you said, recognizing what you need and so for you, it’s creativity for someone else, it may be a workout, but recognizing you as a person and saying, “What is it that Marc needs? What is it that Spencer needs?” Making it happen. Even if it’s simply getting outside, getting some fresh air, getting a walk in, and recognizing, “If I don’t do this somehow I’m impacting myself negatively.”

It builds up, and you don’t have time for certain things, and then you realize. For me, like even something as simple as “I haven’t seen a friend all week. Why am I sad? Why am I feeling lonely?” I will call a friend up. If I can’t see them in person, like make a connection with someone if that’s what feeds me and that’s what I need. Do it. Take the time and make the time to do it, but sometimes it’s easier said than done, and at all the different times your needs can change as you said. For me, my needs changed too, and checking in with yourself and being on that journey, figuring out what you need at this present moment is another factor of self-care. It’s like spending time with yourself and getting to know yourself what you need and what’s best for you in the present moment.

Normalize It Forward | Spencer Ganus | College Students

Young Adult And Mental Health

You had an interesting age in that you are out of college, but I can still consider you a young adult twenties and approaching, getting into your career spreading your wings, and getting into that age bracket where people start thinking about relationships and families and all that stuff and I’m wondering, when you think about young adults and the mental health of young adults, so anxiety and depression in particular. Anxiety and depression right now are at an all-time high. Anxiety in young adults and depression are the statistics that are through the roof. I’m wondering, when you hear me say that, why do you think that is?

Being a young adult and someone who also has dealt with and still sometimes deals with anxiety, I go to therapy too, and I have, but a lot of time working on myself to be the stable person that I am, but everyone has their days too. Someone who’s not an outsider and what you are talking about. There are so many factors, and I hate to say it because I work in social media, but I do think a factor not be factored, but a factor is the age of technology and the accessibility we have to seeing what we may not have, comparing ourselves to other people, comparing ourselves to even, for me, past versions of myself that I have posted about online that I have to live up to. That’s a very niche thing for me, but that affects my mental health, is living up to the standard that I have seen created online of this person who embodies wellness. What if I’m not feeling so hot one day?

Suddenly, if I am not embodying this thing that I’m promoting am I inauthentic and spiraling in that way? Technology has a big effect on all of us in some capacity, positively, connecting us to incredible sources of information and being a creative outlet. I have seen more positives than negatives from social media, being in the field that I’m in intentionally, but I do think it’s taken a toll on my mental health many times, I do think the pandemic also had an effect on us.

I didn’t walk across the stage when I graduated from Duke and all my hard work. I got lucky that I even sat at a graduation, but we sat in masks, 6 feet apart, on the football field. They never called my name. They never shook anyone’s hand, and my diploma was mailed to me. It didn’t feel like the same level of gratification in a silly way for all the work that I put in, and that was a big bummer and that’s not to say that your anxiety is a product of a particular event like that.

Living in the age of the pandemic, post-pandemic, combined with technology, combined with my generation especially, there’s a shift with Gen Z of people who are more entrepreneurial, and it’s more acceptable to be a full-time freelancers, to be balancing multiple jobs, to have a side hustle. It’s a common language among my generation, and as someone who does have a lot of different jobs, I’m busy. I have my hands in a lot of different things, and it’s like maybe it’s my circle in Los Angeles being a more artist and entrepreneurial-oriented city, but in this city, there’s a lot of pressure to have more than a 9:00 to 5:00. If you think you have a 9:00 to 5:00, that’s all you have a 9:00 to 5:00. Do you have a side hustle? What do you do with your free time? Do you have a hobby? You don’t have a hobby? It’s like you go from 9:00 to 5:00, or what else do you do? At this age, with, again, social media, there’s this pressure to monetize your free time, monetize all your hobbies.

The age of the post-pandemic made Generation Z more entrepreneurial. It is now more acceptable to be a full-time freelancer, balance multiple jobs, or have a side hustle. Share on X

I have put this pressure on myself, and that’s been a huge contributing factor to my anxiety, is that standard? I have stopped for myself the pressure I feel from my generation to constantly be achieving and doing and leveling up, and it’s positive and if it’s not taken too far, and when it’s taken too far, it can take a toll on mental health. That’s why my generation is suffering.

College Admission

I would agree. As a therapist, one of the things that I see is the measuring stick has become social media. Right now, with young people, social media doesn’t exist. You were compared to the people next to you, the people you heard about. Now, you are compared to 100 million of your closest friends on social media. It’s never enough. Someone could be working a zillion hours, and in some ways, it feels like, why aren’t you working a zillion and one? When you look at the definition of mental health or happiness, that takes away from your happiness. You have to go. I see it. It’s funny. I see it mentioned, Duke. I see it when kids are applying to college.

I work in college admissions, one of my million jobs, and let me tell you. It’s crazy.

Essay writing and all that stuff. For me, 4.0 used to be the highest. Then it went up to 4.3, and now it’s 4.6. I’m like, what does it stop at? At some point, you say, “This is a person who’s intelligent, obviously doing well in school, but they are not at the top of their game and everybody seems to be trying to get to that top,” which is a pressure cooker.

The funniest part is when kids get out of college, and you probably know this to be true because you’ve been out for a while now, everybody has a degree. When you get out of college, you are sitting in a room. Everyone’s got no one cares at that point. Are you this or that? What they care about is what kind of person you are, what you bring to the table, and how hard you can work. Social media has been harsh. COVID has been equally harsh. It makes me sad to hear that he didn’t get to walk across the stage because everybody who works hard like that deserves that. They deserve that attention.

That’s a silly thing to bring up as a thing that I don’t think cuts it off every day but that’s like a microcosm of college being like everything about the hard work and everything about the product, and the college admissions process too. Working with these students, there’s pressure. Do you think it’s the parents often? It’s the students even putting the pressure on themselves, and the friends leveling up next to them? “My friend got in here, and why didn’t I get in?” It’s breaking up friendships.

The list could go on about the college admissions process and I feel like I’m grateful. I work with a company that has strong, amazing values, and that’s why I work in this space. It’s because we do a lot of free essay reviews and amazing resources we offer for people who are underprivileged and I work with students on scholarships as well. The only reason I get excited to work in this space is to feel like I’m making an impact, even if it’s on a small scale, with students who either would have access to these resources and also students who wouldn’t and that’s helpful for me as someone who always wants to align with work that is aligned to my values, because that’s part of living intentionally. Even for you to be able to have a conversation with someone a couple of years younger and remind them, “You are supposed to be pursuing this to be happy.” That’s supposed to be part of the process. Let’s not lose that. I could see you doing that and doing a good job of that. I love you hearing all that.

Thank you. Teaching at a school right now in person, is my first day. There are big kids, and they are all awesome. I get to teach in person. It’s such a treat. I’m like, “The connectivity versus Zoom. It’s not the same.”

How old are the kids you are teaching?

These are mostly rising juniors and some seniors, so all college prep work, but a little bit more broad writing skills and writing a personal statement and what it’s like to learn to express yourself more in an essay over the course of the next two and a half weeks. We’ll be working together. It’s a pretty long time to get to know each other and hopefully make a real impact on their writing abilities and their lives.

Time management

Another area I wanted to ask you about in terms of wellness that goes, it’s not talked about nearly enough, is time management and I always feel like the students that I work with going into college, most of them don’t use calendars. Most of them don’t even use email, believe it or not. To introduce them to that and then to link it to, “The more management you use, I believe the more you can drive your anxiety down because you know what’s coming.” I’m curious, what are your thoughts about time management? Has that impacted you?

I agree with what you said about minimizing anxiety. If not for my calendar I use the iCal app because it’s on my phone and my computer I cannot imagine what I would do without my calendar. Having as many jobs as I do and still trying to have a social life and still trying to take time for myself, I could truly not function without my calendar and honestly, without reminders, I feel like I’m the person where, even talking to you about scheduling the Zoom interview, if I don’t respond to a text right away and I open it, I’ve forgotten about it and that’s the truth about myself.

The more you get to know yourself, the more you know what tools you need. For me, I use my notes app religiously. I always have a to-do list, and I check things off every day. What I’m doing if I didn’t have my notes app where I was writing to-do lists every day, I would not know what I was doing. If I wasn’t able to mark emails as flagged or unread texts that I haven’t responded to yet because I’m in the middle of something, I wouldn’t get to it. Some people are better at micromanaging little things like that, and maybe they have more capacity in their brain to multitask in that way, the way that I don’t but learning about myself, I have learned what systems help me with these little things.

The more you know yourself, the more you know what tools you need. Share on X

Those little things are a huge contributor to overall time management when you feel more organized and you are able to block your time and your week, that’s when you have the time for self-care. That’s the only way I could function doing all of these different types of endeavors that I’m doing. I have even imparted some of this idea of organization to the students that I work with. I use organizational platforms. It’s like an online software that is like a Google Drive meets the Notes app shared feature, like a co-work space. Monday is similar, or Asana like all those kinds of workspaces, but I use Notion to help my students stay organized. They always have a to-do list and know what our Zoom link is and when we are meeting. They know what their homework is and what my homework is for them. Organizational systems like that for all of my businesses to manage my time are crucial.

It’s a work in progress for me. I’m still a work in progress in every way, and there are days when I do get stuck scrolling. Sometimes I start looking for inspiration and then I end up on my phone for an hour, and I’m like, “That wasn’t part of the plan. Let’s readjust.” Time management is key for efficiency, trying to do multiple things, and minimizing your anxiety. To do those things efficiently you have to have time management.

You juggle a lot. You are an excellent example of that and as you mentioned, the entrepreneurial attitude of young adults nowadays, there are many more people out there doing that and doing all things.

In college too, I can’t imagine not having a calendar in college, because it’s the first time that your class schedule isn’t eight to three. Your parents drop you off and pick you up, or you drive yourself and drive yourself home, maybe a senior year of high school. In college, I was part of two dance groups. I was the vice president of the Buddhist Meditation Club. I did like everything I could do on campus because I was like,” I wanted to soak up the juice. I wanted to take advantage of my time there.”

If I wanted to go to a party with my friends but I had a midterm due, I wouldn’t have known my midterm was due if it wasn’t on my calendar. Finding those organizational structures sooner rather than later, in high school, I even had a calendar. I had a crazy agenda. My mom, luckily, helped me in doing that and was like, “Make your doctor appointments.” I made my appointments and I could drive when I had races. Those are the things that I was lucky to learn from a young age, learning sooner rather than later if you are learning for the first time in college, is a little tricky, but it’s still better to learn in college than when you are 25, you get the real job.

Normalize It Forward | Spencer Ganus | College Students

First Weeks At School

I don’t know if you remember your first couple of weeks at school. Do you remember your first couple of weeks? What was one of your big surprises that you got to school and you were like, “I didn’t see this coming?”

I did an amazing pre-orientation program that Duke offered. It was an arts camp. It was like a student. All my counselors were older students. It was all freshmen incoming, and they divided us into small groups. I had this opportunity to get eased into the college experience, and that was the first surprise. I thought I was going to show up and it was going to be first-day-of-school vibes, where I’m a little fish in a massive pond, where I knew nobody. I flew across the country. My parents said bye to me at the airport. I got on a plane and went from Los Angeles to Durham, North Carolina very differently. I didn’t know anybody, and I was at first surprised with how excited I was and not anxious, as someone who usually does run anxious for new experiences out of my control.

Instantly found people who I shared values within this art space, who I could connect with over things like music, dance, and acting. It felt like a safe space and that was a very unique college experience. A unique entry to college that not all students are offered, but that a lot of schools have orientation programs to ease freshmen. I recommend taking advantage of that and finding people who you vibe with, whether it’s through a particular part of that orientation like maybe there’s a part of the orientation that’s geared towards a particular interest of yours. Maybe you play a sport, and there’s a sports orientation.

Going to the orientation with what might be your people not to say they are going to be your best friends. I didn’t even end up staying friends with most people from my program, but I did find some of my best friends through that program. It was surprising off the bat to find people across the country amidst this massive environment. We are expected to feel so anxious and isolated, but I found people who I shared things with. Looking ahead, it was surprising to see I didn’t say that about all of them. It was like I had my freshman week friends, and some of them were freshman week friends.

I would say hi to all and that was it.  I was surprised and I wish I had been a bit less presumptuous of expecting to feel a negative way and a little more open-minded to knowing I might not feel anxious at all. I could get there and feel instantly comfortable and not feel like I wanted to run to the bathroom and throw up. That was not something that I ever thought would be an easy transition, and had I been more open-minded, the plane ride over would have been a little bearing.

Advice For Incoming College Students

That brings me to the last question I want to ask you. If you are talking directly to an incoming student, an incoming college kid, eighteen years old. All sorts of thoughts. Do you have a piece of advice?

Something that people told me that I didn’t believe when I got to college and this is specific but your major doesn’t determine everything, and what you choose to study does not determine your career. If you change your major, it’s not the end of the world. Every school has different protocols for certain applications that require you to pick majors in certain programs or are more competitive than others. Not saying it’s easy to go from being an engineer to an English major.

I do think that the pressure I felt to make a 5-year plan when I was 17 years old was pressure that I never needed to feel, with anxiety that I never needed to feel. I graduated. I studied literature, cultural studies, and philosophy. I co-published a book on the study of ethics, and now I’m working as an actress, a dancer, and a college counselor. I’m on your show. I’m doing all of these random careers that, frankly, mine are using my brain, talking to people, and learning to express myself. They have nothing to do.

Sorry, Mom and Dad, but for me the specific answer would be don’t stress so much about your major, or your five-year plan, all those little things are so insignificant in the grand scheme of your life. If you are going into a field that is technical, like learning how to do computer science to be a software engineer, try it, and if it doesn’t work out, you don’t have to do that for the rest of your life. You are not married to that but be open-minded with what you want to study.

Take it on a little bit of a larger scale generally being open-minded and knowing that things are going to work out, and things are not going to work out. You might think you met your husband during the first week of school, and then you realize you don’t think you like him at all. I think being open-minded, if I could go back in time and give my younger self advice, would be to roll with the punches and relax a little bit more. Enjoy it. People say it’s the best time of your life. Take those classes that you are like, “Maybe I want to study this. Maybe I don’t.” If it’s not that serious, if you don’t have it all figured out and that’s something I felt like I had to have a lot of things figured out because suddenly I wasn’t a kid anymore I was living across the country, and the pressure from the investment of the money and the investment of all the things that they make college out to be in the movies.

Enjoying it and remembering it’s supposed to be fun and educational. The last thing I will say is to take the opportunity to use college as your growth journey, battlefield, or frankly, you are going to get hit with a lot of things but using it not as a place to learn but as a trade school opportunity, but as a chance to learn about yourself and to grow. If the best thing out of college you get, besides your degree, is people skills and learning about yourself, then it was a successful college experience.

Use college not just as a place to learn but also as a chance to learn about yourself and to grow. Share on X

It’s not bad. It’s great advice. In many ways, you are saying, “Be willing to try new things,” and, “Attend new classes. Expand your horizons.” Most kids are going to school in different areas. Embrace that a bit. It sounds like a nice journey, and as you said, honestly, no one has a 100% lovely journey through college. There’s going to be tough days.

I call my parents more than once.

Episode Wrap-Up

In many ways, that’s typical. I always tell kids, I’m like, “You’d have to have a pretty awful house to not miss it at all when you go to college.” You are going to have some of that but the opportunity to open their world up in those ways is immense. I appreciate your time, Spencer. You are fantastic.

I appreciate you having me. Thank you so much. You’re awesome.  I love your mission and everything you stand for, so I’m happy to support you.

Can I put you on the spot for one second? Part of what we are doing in the show is asking people that we interview to nominate another individual so that we can continue the conversation. You need to talk about wellness, and I didn’t know if you had a friend, a co-worker, a relative, or someone.

Not to keep it in the family, but my mom nominated me. I have so much admiration for how she raised me, and the intentionality I live with is such a byproduct of the house that I was raised in by both my parents. My brother is someone who embodies the same spirit. He launched a business called Collegiate Mind Mastery. That’s all about baseball players going on the professional track who are any age, from elementary through high school, and even some college students he’s working with now too. All about everything and what it takes to be a collegiate athlete from mindset and mental health to physical health and nutrition and everything and he built such an amazing brand and program with that. He’s such an asset to chat with.

That would be great. What’s your brother’s first name?

His name is Tyler Ganus. His Instagram is @TylerGanus. If you want to check it out there. He’s a whole brand there too, but maybe that would be a nice conversation.

I appreciate you nominating him. I will reach out. Spencer, thank you so much for your time. You’ve been amazing. I love the fact that you represent both college as well as post-college, and you’ve been very honest about things. I want to just make a point of saying this there are so many times that I will interview someone and they give me this glossed-up version of everything is perfect, and we all know that the normalcy of life is that we have our ups and downs. The way you put it out there, that just works. Thanks again.

I’m so glad. Thank you so much for your time. You are not an awesome interviewer. I appreciate it and good luck with your show. Hopefully, you get in touch with my brother.

Thank you so much. I appreciate that.

Take care. Have a good rest of your day.

 

Important Links

 

About Spencer Lacey Ganus

Normalize It Forward | Spencer Ganus | College StudentsSpencer Lacey Ganus , who is an actress and voice actress. 2 of her roles She’s best known for are the Comedy Central television series, South Park As Ike as, as well as teen Elsa in frozen.

We are particularly interested to talk about healthy with Spence wellness and lifestyle social media blog that she currently runs.

 

 

Normalize It Forward | Bradley Ganus | Mental Health

 

Marc Lehman delves into an open discussion about mental health and wellness with Ellen Bradley Ganus, online business expert, entrepreneur, athlete, and network. Ellen explains why self-care, consistent incremental efforts, and strict time management are crucial in maintaining sound mental health and finding genuine joy every single day. She also talks about the importance of embracing mindfulness practices and the right way to balance eating, sleeping, and exercising to secure significant personal growth.

Watch the episode here

 

Listen to the podcast here

 

Mental Health And Wellness With Ellen Bradley Ganus

Welcome, everybody. This is a day where we’re going to talk about mental health and wellness. This project is called Normalize It Forward. We are welcomed by a fantastic guest, Ellen Bradley Ganus.

 

Normalize It Forward | Bradley Ganus | Mental Health

 

Ellen Bradley Ganus

Ellen, I have to say that as I was reviewing all of the things that you’ve done, online business expert, entrepreneur, athlete, and networker, you are a super passionate individual and, certainly, mom is at the top of the list. You’ve done so many different things. I wonder if I could toss a ball to you and have you tell us a little bit about who Ellen Bradley Ganus is.

For the sake of the readers and the subject at hand, which is all about mental health and wellness for families, children, and so on and so forth, I do many different things. However, everything is motivated by my love of family and wanting to be the best mother that I could be. My children are grown. It is my son’s birthday. He’s 22. My daughter is 25. Even though they’re no longer living at home, we still work and cultivate this relationship at every new stage of life.

My background is as an actress. I’ve been in the arts my whole life. I met my husband on a TV show when I was eighteen at Northwestern University. I have had what feels like so many lives since then. For the last couple of years, I’ve had the great pleasure of aligning with a health and wellness company that has allowed me to provide solutions for people who are looking for foundational elements to living their best life. Meaning, they want to look better, they want to feel better, and they want to be better. 

What I learned over the last few decades is that when we don’t have the key nutrients in our body working right, it doesn’t matter how many affirmations we do or how many counselors we see. If we’re going home and we’re relying on that bag of Fritos, you are what you eat. Part of mental wellness, as it relates to what I’ve done, is really about that nutritional foundation for well-being.

I still work in the arts. I’m a flamenco dancer by night. I’m producing a film. I’m still acting. I’ve always had a love of personal development in every aspect of it, which led me to become a triathlete in the sports world and then allowed me to continue to be physical and active in the dancing world. The last few decades though relative to nutrition and mental wellness have been my great focus.

You’re a person who whenever I’ve asked you what you’re up to, you never say, “Hanging around.” You’re always doing things, which is great. You’re doing wonderful things.

Thank you.

Self-Care

That leads us to the first topic I wanted to chat about, which is self-care. Self-care is so important when it comes to mental health and wellness. I’m curious to throw the topic out to you and ask what self-care is and why it is so important.

Self-care is everything about cultivating a great relationship with yourself. People have it backward. We’re seeking outside validation on a regular basis, especially with social media, likes, comments, and what’s the interaction there. The reality is if we don’t have a relationship with ourselves, if we don’t feel good when the door closes, or if we don’t feel good when we are alone and we can’t enjoy being alone, then we’re not going to have very successful relationships outside of self. Self-care is honoring yourself, being true to yourself, and building a relationship with yourself where you’re able to identify the pain, able to identify the joy, and able to make strategic changes in your daily routines to stay better attached to that path that is helping you live your best life.

I love that. Self-care is one of those things that everybody defines a little differently. You’re right. In many ways, we’ve got decisions to make as a human being. Some of those decisions that we make aren’t healthy. Some of them are. For some reason, selfishness has gotten such a negative tone in our community that it makes it hard sometimes for people, especially parents, to step out and go to the gym, go to a therapist, or do things that we know to be healthy for them.

When you’re exhausted, stressed out, and not taking care of yourself as a parent, you cannot be patient with your kids. You cannot be as loving as you’re capable of being. If you don’t feel good, how can you behave like you are feeling good?

When parents are exhausted, stressed out, and not taking care of themselves, they cannot be patient with your kids. Share on X

No doubt.

It really comes down to sharpening the saw. When we take care of ourselves, we’re in a better place to take care of others.

My next thought about self-care is the fundamentals that I talk about. I know you feel so passionate about eating, sleeping, and exercising. You’re so passionate about doing those things and managing all three. I feel like every human being, including me, has trouble managing all three on a regular basis but we know in the backs of our brains, that’s the key. If we can do those three things, we’re generally in a healthier place. I’ll ask you. Why is it so hard to manage all three? 

Nobody could do everything all at once. What they say is the best way to eat an elephant is one bite at a time. It has to do with understanding that if we’re consistent, even if it’s 1% a day, that 1% can grow into 2%, 3%, 4%, or 5%. It all starts with very small incremental changes, but the key is consistency. If you think of your life like a pizza pie and you divide it into sections, ask yourself, “How much am I moving? Am I sitting at a desk all day? Am I not moving my body? Am I not helping my cardiovascular health? Am I not getting that blood through my body so that my muscles feel agile and good?”

Our vitality is directly connected to movement. It doesn’t mean that you have to be a triathlete. It doesn’t mean that you have to compete in anything. It means that every day, you do something, even if it begins with taking a walk. When you talk about how you manage it, you manage it by focusing on those different slices of the pizza pie a little bit each day and maybe eliminating a little bit of sugar in your diet.

It doesn’t mean you’re going to make a whole different dietary change. Maybe start with one thing. It may be eliminating a little bit of white flour or a little bit of sugar, having your protein before your carbs, or decreasing a little bit of the calories that you’re taking in a day. Choose one aspect of eating. Choose one aspect of exercise. Help yourself go to bed maybe fifteen minutes earlier than you would’ve. Maybe go to bed earlier but also wake up fifteen minutes earlier. How can you give yourself more time in the day? Especially busy families, You have to find the time that everybody else doesn’t need us. It’s the consistency of small incremental changes and then focusing on all those different aspects of self-care.

You said it really well. Your kids are very similarly aged to my kids. We’ve been through that rollercoaster if we don’t have a moment to do these things. I love how you said that. Do it 1 bit at a time or 1 step at a time so it’s not so overwhelming. Let’s face it. When we’re overwhelmed, we throw our hands up and don’t do anything, right?

That’s right. Fear, uncertainty, and overwhelm lead to the same thing, which is inaction. You have to break that cycle. You have to do some sort of pattern interrupt to get you out of that. It also has a lot to do with who you hang around with and what your circle is like.

 

Normalize It Forward | Bradley Ganus | Mental Health

 

Mental Health

No doubt. Healthier individuals tend to breed healthier individuals. The more people surround themselves with like-minded individuals that way, the healthier they become. Speaking of health, the phrase mental health, I’m always fascinated by this. When I say mental health, what do you think of?

I think of my ability to process life, engage with life, and be joyful in life on a regular basis.

That’s a really good definition. Often, I interact with young adults or their parents. Physical health, we got it covered. Everybody knows what physical health is. When we get a broken leg, we go to the doctor. We got that. When it comes to mental health, anxiety and depression are at an all-time high for young people. My area of work is often on college campuses. To me, the amount of kids that are either anxious or depressed is overwhelming. It’s going up each year for lots of different reasons. I wonder from your perspective what you think some of the causes might be that have led to such incremental rises in mental health for kids.

There is so little human interaction. We are being machine-taught. We’re socializing on machines. It has completely broken down the ability for people to know how to communicate and know how to express themselves on all levels. It has skewed our ability to trust because we don’t even know what it is to have a real relationship. We’re measuring relationships by, “Who ghosted me this week?” That has led to where we are. We’re living in unprecedented times politically. With good reason, people are stressed. It’s a very difficult time.

I want to share something with you that I wasn’t going to bring up, but it’s important as a mother, as we talk about anxiety, and as we talk about moving forward. This is why his birthdays are always so special to our family. When my son was two years old, he had a vaccine for diphtheria and tetanus. I was on the National Vaccine Association. I was trying to help the Vaccine Association make vaccines safer for children.

Mental health is one’s ability to process life, engage with life, and be joyful in life on a regular basis. Share on X

In an ironic moment, we took this vaccine, and then two days later, my son’s bone marrow stopped working. We were hospitalized at Children’s Hospital in ICU for a four-year journey. He had no white cells. He had no red cells. He had no platelets. If you touched him, he would bleed to death. The only opportunity for him to stay alive was, at that time, a bone marrow donation which had to be from a sibling. My daughter wasn’t a match.

When we talk about stress, I’m sure that every parent here can only imagine what it would be like to be faced with a two-year-old in a hospital with a PICC line to his heart and not knowing if each day is going to be the last. My daughter was in kindergarten. We lived every single day not knowing what the next day would bring.

Honestly, he’s a miracle. We did forms of chemo that took his body down to nothing, and then slowly, reticulocytes and red cells came back. A lot of gratitude, a lot of life, and a lot of trying to figure out how to move forward from there, releasing the fear of what we experienced and deciding how we are going to live our life and what’s important. Everybody has to say to themselves, “What’s important to me? What brings me joy? How is it that I am contributing to my family, my friends, my community, and the world?” It’s through our contribution and sense of purpose that we can rise above everything.

It was coming out of that journey that made me link arms with this company that was forming in order to educate about the perils of toxicity in our world. By cleansing the body at a cellular level and rebuilding the body, we had a better chance of staying alive. I made that my mission. That turned into the whole nutrition of how we feel, how we look, and all of this stuff that I talked about.

Coming out of that was a complete paradigm shift. Everybody needs a personal paradigm shift. They need an exploration of that inventory of, “Where have I been? How am I feeling? What’s got to change?” It’s up to us to make those changes. When it comes to children, the adults in their lives who love them have to be the ones to foster communication and try to dig in and find out what’s going on in their lives.

When we got out of the hospital, I wanted to expose my children to everything. I wanted to uncover their talents. They were never on screens. They were never playing video games. It’s not that there’s anything wrong with that, but everything in moderation. We started teaching my son piano from the hospital bed. He and my daughter ended up being concert pianists. We gave him dance classes. He then started playing baseball. He’s playing for the Big 10 at Northwestern, hoping for his final year for a draft. He ended up playing in the Pan American Games representing Team USA at twelve.

My point is to expose them to things that they love and then help them stay the course and develop those talents. While other kids were getting bored and existing on social media platforms, they were busy honing a craft. They were busy getting better at something they enjoyed. They were entering into their own competitions to test their skill levels and give themselves a way in which to compete against themselves.

They were interacting with other kids that were doing similar things. We were interacting with other families that had that same priority. I know it’s more difficult now than it was then because everything is machines now, but you’ve got to find your space to play a sport, play an instrument, dance to a song, go out with a friend, or have conversations. That’s what most people are choosing to not do. 

That’s very well said. First of all, thank you so much for sharing that story with all of us. What is your son’s first name, if you don’t mind me asking?

 

Normalize It Forward | Bradley Ganus | Mental Health

 

His Name is Tyler.

Let’s celebrate his birthday. Happy birthday, Tyler. What an amazing, resilient young man and resilient family. You guys have been through a lot. I like so much of what you had to say. I told you that I wrote down passionate. When I was talking about you, I wrote down passionate. She’s passionate. As a mom and as a parent, you said it best. We have moved away from this type of interaction, this direct interaction.

I’m a virtual therapist. I see people in my office and I see people online. I’m the first one to say nothing’s going to replace in-person connection. When I talk to young people and they won’t go into a store to talk to a store manager about employment opportunities, it makes me sad. I also know, and you know this, that when kids go off to college and they don’t have that ability to talk to people, how do we as adults expect them to make friends? Let’s say you got a social kid in high school. They go from a bunch in high school to none. They go to college and it’s a whole new world. I agree with you.

Happiness And Challenges

One of the biggest reasons why we’re here is I want to normalize the conversation and get young people and parents to understand it’s okay to have struggles and challenges. What’s more important is what are you doing about them and what steps are you taking to help find your happiness in this world. Happiness comes in all different sizes and shapes.

It has to be defined by the individual. What makes each person happy is going to be different. A large part of mental wellness relative to everything we’re talking about is mindfulness. I raised my kids as yogis. We’re all yogis. Meditation was a part of our life from the minute we were born. I highly recommend that as something to explore.

There are great apps like Balance. You can still get it for free. It’s guided visualizations. They even have sensorial meditations where your phone will vibrate in your hands according to the gongs, according to the storms, and according to whatever the ambient meditation is. It’s such a great way to get your feet wet. Even if you don’t know anything about it, start some practice of getting quiet with yourself.

Time Management

It’s a tool. Let’s face it. We could all use additional tools. Clearly, every kid goes to school with their phone in their pocket, so to have an app on that phone that teaches them how to do things like that is great. Lots of people aren’t experienced with that. I appreciate the suggestion. That’s fantastic. The more tools kids can have, the greater their wellness gets and things like going off to school don’t have to be so daunting. You mentioned mindfulness. Time management is also a part of wellness. Let me ask this. What are some things as an individual you do to manage your time?

I always make my schedule the night before and always leave space in the day for the unexpected and welcome unexpected miracles. I try to not overschedule. I leave what I call blank space. I make my schedule the night before and time block according to activities. Time blocking might be the first two hours of the day for my meditation, my workout, my journaling, and my gratitude. That’s uninterrupted no matter what. You have to have the time blocks that are non-negotiables for yourself.

I’m an entrepreneur. It’s a little bit different from a corporate job. If you have a corporate job, you’re going to have a task list and you’re going to have when you arrive, when you go home, and what your check off for the day is. For me, it’s about what are my income-producing activities, what is growing my pipeline, and all the different aspects of what completes my day. I made a schedule the night before. I time block. I make sure there’s empty space in the day. Every night before I go to bed, I do the same thing so that I have a schedule. Some people feel like, “If I make a schedule, I’m going to feel like I’m in jail,” or something. When you make a schedule, it gives you more free time.

I agree. It gives you the bumpers of the day. I’m 100% on board with what you said. Let me ask you this. You said your kids are 23 and 20.

22 and 25.

Out of curiosity,  from your own observation, what do they do for time management?

They do the same thing. I have a list from my son in elementary school. At the end of the list, he would always put, “Have fun!” They took great responsibility for how they were planning their day. My daughter, Spencer, worked really well with calendars and stickers, making it visually appealing.  She could see, “This is going to be one of my dance classes,” and she could look forward to that. If she had a paper that was due and maybe she was having to put time into something she didn’t want to do, she could always look at the schedule and know it was coming. The key is the night before planning the day. You won’t have your activities for the month but nailing down that daily schedule the night before is everything.

The key to time management is planning the night before. Nailing down that daily schedule the night before is everything. Share on X

It’s a great suggestion. I love that you make time for things that pop up unexpectedly. I love what your son did when he wrote, “Have fun!” If we’re not having fun in our day, we’re missing out. Tomorrow’s another day, but guess what? We can have fun. Making some time, making some space, and making it important to take care of ourselves, which is so unbelievably important.

Ellen’s Nominee

This has been awesome. I appreciate you making the time. I know you’re busy and this is such a great topic to talk through. I feel like you and I could talk for hours about this, but I know we don’t have hours. Let me ask you this. Part of the project of the show is that I’d like to continue the conversation. One of the things I’m asking everybody is to nominate a friend, a coworker, or a relative that you think would be helpful to talk to and interview on this platform and discuss health and wellness. Do you have anyone in your circle that you think would be helpful for you?

It would be terrific if you wanted to interview my daughter. When she was thirteen, we did a campaign called Bridging the Gap. This was about the relevance of young people’s voices as well as the relevance of the middle-aged. We’re living in a world right now where young people who have access to everything sometimes feel that the adults in their lives don’t have important messages anymore. They can figure it out and they can find it on their own.

Through the campaign I did with my daughter and the work we did when she was younger, there was this very interesting place where we met in the middle. We respect each other, listen to each other, and learn from each other. As a philosophy major and literature major, she’s got a wide net of education and experience that will lend to sharing some really important thoughts about the world as a young person but also someone who has grown up in a family that was extremely mindful that also went through some very difficult challenges. I would suggest a conversation with my daughter.

Episode Wrap-up

I would love that. You’ve got my information. Put her in touch with me. We’ll set something up. The life of a young person, and sometimes, I feel like a dinosaur when I say this, is so different from our generation. When you look at the things they go through and the challenges that they have. One of the biggest reasons why I love working with young adults is helping them through that process. I really appreciate it. I look forward to meeting with her and interviewing her. Thank you so much for your time and energy. Have a wonderful rest of your day.  I’ll talk to you soon.

Thank you for having me. Take care.

 

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